Episode Transcript
Tearing The Hinges Off The Door by Ajahn Brahm
So, as usual, I am not quite sure what I'm going to talk about tonight. And just always start opening your mouth and see what comes. But to start off with, I went to Curtin University on Wednesday to give a talk to the local Buddhist university society there. And again, not really understanding or know what I'm supposed to be speaking about. Just started talking about just general religion and spirituality. And I made a point that in our modern times, the religion has gotten very bad name for many people. It's not as a source of peace and harmony and growth in the world, but as a cause for for wars and for anger and even hatred and so many people are forgetting about religions, especially in the educated world. And instead of going for some of their core spirituality. And so I made a little talk on Wednesday afternoon about the spirituality, what it really is and how it actually works, and especially in the context of our Buddhist society here. And sometimes I know that people would allow me to try to talk about all of the basic, um, teachings of the Buddha, talk about all the words for this and the words for that, and trying to give some, um, technical background to Buddhism. But I usually refuse to do that. Usually if you want to do that, you can go and read a book. But here I like to try and get to the heart of all of this, the heart of spirituality. And one of the things I was talking about on Wednesday afternoon was not just another part of spirituality called like compassion and kindness because every religion, every path, but profess to know, have love But sometimes we kill each other for the sake of Allah, or we argue with each other for the sake of our love. And obviously there's something going wrong there. Why is it that this spiritual love, this kindness is compassion, should be creating a better world? But why is it that we now have too many wars, too many arguments, too many quarrels? I find it hard to live with each other. And so I made a point, which I'd been talking about a lot recently, about the spiritual path. It goes in a wrong direction if all we ever think about is ourself, just as the spiritual path goes in the wrong direction. If all we ever think about is the other person. Compassion is not just thinking of the other. Compassion is not thinking about oneself, nor is it thinking about both of them. There's another place where I think compassion needs to be aimed, and the point of the little talk I gave a curtain was up to the point where the compassion should be aimed is not at the other, not at yourself, but the place between you, that space between the other person and yourself. In the space where relationship happens. That's where compassion should go. That's where love arises. I know that sometimes. I remember reading about her, some Christianity and people actually claiming that love comes from a God. So that's the originator. As if that you have to believe in a God for compassion, for kindness, for love to arise. And that is wrong. There are many atheists who are just mercy loving and kind people. And there's another place where that kindness and love can come from. But you will find that if you focus on the other person, you may start with love. But after a while there will be hatred and anger. It isn't that so. You started off falling in love with your partner. And how long does it last? Sometimes only a week or two weeks before you have the first argument. But the point is, why are you getting angry? Because we're focusing on the wrong spot. If you focus on the other person or you focus on yourself, then there's no spirituality there. That's almost like materialism. The material, them or me, is something else. And this is what I call focusing on what's between you. So those who have a partner, don't think of them. Don't think of yourself. Think of what's between you And when we start to focus on that point, we start to see a whole area of spirituality opens up to us. That whole area of spirituality, which which creates enormous amount of growth and solving a problems, is not just people, but events. Things we have to deal with in life. It's not us, which is a problem. It's not the event which we have to experience, which is a problem. It's what's between us. It's a problem how we relate to it. And a person who came out to see me just a few moments ago, and they just said I had good news and bad news. I hope you don't mind me saying this. The good news was they got cancer. I know I got it wrong, man. Maybe I should say it that way. Get the wrong way around. And the bad news was they're getting married and I got the wrong way around. What did I. I don't think that would be right. But anyhow, it's really both good news, as far as I can see. Because it doesn't really matter whether you're getting married or not. Doesn't matter whether you're getting cancer or not. What's important is, was between you and the cancer was between you and the getting married business. How we adapt and relate to these things. That is where compassion, where love will wisdom arises. This was one of the great things which I was impressed with in Buddhism was that he was a Buddha actually saying, it's not that cancer is wrong. It's not that marriage is right. It's not the death is a big problem. It's not that sort of grief is the difficulty. All the problems seem to be our relationships to these things. When you call like attachment, craving, anger, sort of ill, will you look at those things which in Buddhist we make like the evil if you like the devil or whatever you want to call it, it's not a being, it's actually what lies between things. That's where the problem lies, though. Sometimes you're saying, oh, maybe I've got too many possessions, which is what somebody else was saying when I was asking people, what should I talk about tonight? I said, oh, talk about we've got too many possessions in life because they almost died recently. I think, my goodness, if I did, I won't look after all that rubbish I've collected. It's not the rubbish you've collected, it's not the material possessions which is the problem or the lack of them. Here's what's between you and those possessions, how you relate to them, how you use them, how you make a life between them. That's where the problem lies, because sometimes you can live very wonderfully and peacefully, having very little dislike as monks and as sometimes, you know, just think how it's the same to someone today. I haven't got any money in my pocket because I haven't even got a pocket to put any money in. I have a mark. If you look at my robes, there's no pockets in there at all, so I don't know where I'd put any money if you gave it to me. But, you know, you're still happy even in your poverty. And some other people are incredibly wealthy and they're happy with their wealth. So does it really matter whether you're rich or whether you're poor? Sometimes people are very miserable in their poverty and sometimes they're very miserable with their wealth. It does not matter how much you have. What's important is what's between you and those possessions, how you regard them. If you regard those possessions as something to protect at all costs, and as many people say these days, it's not that the you own the possessions, the possessions begin to own you. If you haven't got anything, sometimes your poverty begins to own you and you have the wrong attitude towards those things. If you have cancer, it's a cancer. If you have the wrong attitude, the cancer starts to eat at you. However, if you have the right attitude. So the cancer is this beautiful test, this beautiful, uh, path, which you have to really work hard at, is a kick out the backside of life to really get your act together. Because, you know, you know that life is terminal, but you should know that anyway, from the time you are born, you have the terminal disease. You don't need to go to a doctor to be. But diagnosed with a terminal disease. As soon as you are born, you can come to a bunk, and as soon as you are born, I will say you have got the terminal disease called life. You're going to die and I maybe give you 80 years, maybe 90 years of most and then you're going to die. So because of this, it's not the death which is the problem. It's not that a life which is a problem. It's the way we relate to it. And this is where like the idea of compassion should really come in. Because when we have compassion or loving kindness in religion, what actually is it? You know, that old story, my definition of compassion, loving kindness, and my father, the door of my heart is always open. No matter what you do, no matter who you are, a good way of looking at that is a person who can express that degree of compassion and kindness to another. Is this nothing between them Sometimes when we put things, objects between us and another person, then there could be no meeting. And when there's no meeting, there can be no compassion. So what do you sometimes put between you and, say, the cancer or you between that person or you between the events of your life? What do you place there? This is where we have to work in our spiritual or religious life. Instead of placing obstacles in the path of being able to relate, at ease and at peace with other. The whole obstacle religious path is actually removing obstacles. That's why in Buddhism we say it's a path of renunciation and letting go of giving away. But what we're giving away, what we're renouncing, is those obstacles which we put between us and the events and the people of our life. When you lose your job, it's not the case that you've lost. Your job is the problem. It's not you. It is the problem. So we don't look at guilt either. The idea of no self inadequacy. We look what is between us and losing the job. And if there's problems there, we put all this difficulties and obstacles. We can't enjoy it. It's wonderful losing your job. You don't have to wake up early on a Monday morning. You can sleep in, you can watch the TV, or you can go to the monasteries. We've got two monasteries here for your use. You can go there when you lose your job. Isn't it wonderful? You've lost your job. Isn't it wonderful? You got no money. It means you don't have to feel guilty about not giving a donation. To somebody like that. And you can give other people an opportunity to practice their compassion on you because you're poor. It gives Mr. Costello a reason to be generous by giving you income support, whatever it is. If we didn't have any poor people in our world, where could kindness come from? So many of you have lost your job and I'm really, really poor. You're such an important part of Australia without you. Where would Saint Vincent de Paul, the Salvation Army be? They need you. You're really important. So the point is that when we look at these things in a positive light, what we're actually doing, right, you're putting something beautiful in between us and what we're going to experience in life. Now this is what we mean about spirituality. What's between us and what we experience. And once you get that idea, it's not them. It's not what I'm experiencing and it's not me. Then so many of the problems of life have disappeared. And God, we tend to go to those two extremes. It's the thought is out there or the fault is in here. Instead of looking at what's between us to where we say the fault is out there. We start to complain. We get angry at our partner in life, and we want to change them and get rid of them and just go to the lawyers. It's not your husband's fault. It's not your wife's fault. Many of you have learned that by now, by getting married again, and you find it's the same again. Here we go again. You find it wasn't that first partners fault, because the other one you get is just the same. There is not. Therefore, sometimes you have kids and you think, oh my goodness, my kids. But then you go to this, these therapy groups where you see other people with similar kids, you find it's just the same again. And it's one of those amazing discoveries I made when I became a monk. The first few years, you didn't really talk to many people. You just stayed by yourself and meditated. But they came the time when I started teaching, when people would come up to you and ask their problems, and the first person who came out to ask my problem, their problems, I thought, that's really interesting. The second person who came up, I thought, I've heard that before. And then the third person. Here we go again. And it's all the same problem. Maybe dressed in different clothes, but it's always the same problem. Or it's actually basically two problems. It's either. Therefore it's my fault. That's the two problems. If it's my fault, we think I'm not adequate enough. I'm hopeless. I can't do these things. No, I can't hold a relationship together. I can't get a job, I can't meditate, I can't do anything. We always blame ourselves, and that's a big thing of our present world. No guilt, depression, lack of self-esteem, fear, inadequacy. And how many people have got that from time to time? What is it we still think is our fault? It's me. You're looking at the wrong place. If you do that, you just never end. There you go. And worst of all, you go and kill yourself. You commit suicide. And that's a complete waste of time. The reason is you try and kill yourself or you're there again. Afterwards you get reborn. And if you were depressed because you couldn't do anything right beforehand, you'll be even more depressed. When you find you can't even kill yourself. You can't do anything right at all. Just kill your body and you're there again afterwards. So that's a complete waste of time. A stupid thing to do. But more than that is actually, we're looking at the wrong place. In this wonderful actually, to discover in life is not my fault and a wonderful thing to discover. It's not my fault. I was talking to one of my monks because we went to pick up a monk at an airport this afternoon, and I was. This other monk decided he had new a new shortcut because the Tonkin Highway has been extended down to Armadale. So he went that way and I said, great, if we're late, it's your fault. And I said, that's the first thing I learned in leadership class. Always learn to find a scapegoat just in case. One is the one to blame if things go wrong. That's why when the soul is our president, if anything goes wrong in a Buddhist society, you blame him. He's my scapegoat. If anything goes right and you want to play somebody, come. Come over here. So he does the work. But I got that job cutting metal. You see, this is. This is how I think. But the thing is, always blaming thing or praising thing isn't really fair because I've known in my life, I've lived long enough now to see that very often I've been praised for things I didn't do. I don't mind. Being blamed for things I didn't do either. Do you mind then? No. You shouldn't mind either, because it's not the praise and it's not the blame. It's how you relate to it that's the problem. So it's great that sometimes people blame you and criticise you. They make fun of you. This marvellous being a monk, when people look at you, point at you and start laughing, I'm creating happiness in the world for other people. But. Sometimes that happens. Sometimes they look at me and dress like a girl. It's true. These robes. I do quite a bit of happiness in life. Why not be eccentric? But it's the way you deal with it is the problem. And I always try to make jokes to these things. So I think I told you last week, just walking in, I think Stoke on Trent. I think I'd said that last week when I was visiting my mother or visiting a relation, and it was people started laughing at me and I didn't know why until I figured it out, because it was a circus in town and they thought I was one of the clowns. Maybe I should have got a good job as one of the clowns. I know that I was when I was giving a talk in Melbourne some years ago, and a person came out to me afterwards to compliment, compliment me on my, uh, comic timing. And he wanted to know where I got all my material from. And then he offered me a job. He was actually, uh, one of the the big members of the Melbourne Comedy Club, and I was offered a job at the Melbourne Comedy Club. I thought that was really nice. I decided to keep my original job, but nevertheless. The point is, is just not what you experience is a problem. It's not you as a problem. It's how you relate to it. If you can make fun about it and make joy out of it and make something of it. So this is like what we call it the spirituality. The compassion is actually was between you. There's one of the stories I tell about compassion, which actually, for one reason I must have forgotten it didn't get in my book. It was a very beautiful story. I haven't told her for a long time now. This was actually the time when I was teaching in prison, and prisons was a great place, actually, to teach spirituality, because they had this terrible thing about being in jail, and they always knew what was between you and that experience. So that's where you can actually start to work. And that way it's not the prison is the problem. It's not you the the problem. If it was a prison was the problem. There's nothing much you could do about it if it was you. The problem, you know, you were in that green. You're a prisoner. There's not much you can do about it. But what's between you? Now there you can actually make something. You can do something there where I was teaching people, there is actually to be kind, to be accepting, to be at peace with your predicament. And in that kindness, in that peace with our predicament. It did feel like you were in jail anymore. You were free. In particular, when I was in there and talking about these spiritual ideas of kindness and compassion to whatever you were experiencing. One of the prisoners came out to me and said, that's all very well at our program, but in a prison, the idea of compassion is just not on. If you smile as someone out of compassion, you're liable to get a fist right in your nose. This is tough macho men territory, but I always I'm always up for a challenge. That's one of the wonderful things about life. Give it a try and see what happens. So I challenge this prisoner and what I actually said to him and said, okay, who's a person in this chair you hate the most? Who's your biggest enemy? Who is the guy who you really, really hate really deeply? Without any hesitation, he said. This particular prison officer, who was a senior officer who everybody detested in this prisoner, told me why. By giving me an example, he said this last week, this particular prisoner, who hadn't had a visit for many months, his wife managed to get a car and get a lift to Carnet Prison pharmacy just next to our monastery. She managed to he managed to get a visit, but as soon as this senior officer recognized this prisoner's wife had come, he asked his prisoner, who didn't know his wife had arrived yet. While his wife was checking in, he asked this prisoner to go on an errand on the other side of the prison farm. That prison farm is about two kilometers wide. And so by the time his wife had checked in by the time they called on the PA system, would prisoner so-and-so please come to the visitor's area? You have a visit. He was way out of range of the PA system. He couldn't hear. Prison officer knew that, but would not say where he'd send that prisoner. By the time they found him, the visiting hours were over so he couldn't get his visit. It was done out of meanness, out of spite. How did this mean spiritedness of this prison officer? That's why all these prisoners called him a doc. They actually called him much more than that. But that's again, all I can say, because there are children here and I've got a reputation to maintain. Sort of. Anyway, I lost most of it, but this is the sort of thing he was personally was. So I said, great. Now this is your challenge to see if you can change what you have between this prison officer and yourself, your relationship. Because the moment there's a big barrier there between the two of you, so you can't really relate, see if you can break that barrier down by kindness, by loving kindness. And I mention this because this is one of those success stories. If a prisoner could actually change one of these terrible prison officers, then surely you can do something with your partner. Well, we all can. So whatever it is you've got. Because I told him so. Every time you relate to that dog. Relate to him with as much metta, with much loving kindness, with as much gentleness, with as much concern, with as much respect as you can possibly muster, and actually put the attention not with him, because if it was him, you'd just see the dog there, not just with you, the recipients of victim, but see what you've got between you. Make that beautiful. So you did this when I went back a week later, he said, it's a waste of time. Okay. But then, of course, it takes a long time to actually to change relationships, but carry on. Because this particular prisoner had a job, everyone has her a job in the prisons, and his job was actually looking after the the senior officers, you know, in the the people who did all the paperwork. And he had to make them tea or coffee every day. So I told you, every time you make a cup of tea, the relationship you have to that cup of tea or coffee make it a wonderful. So when you're making the coffee, you see the coffee, you see what's in between them. Make it beautiful. So you put love there, you put care there, you put respect there. That's what he did. He tried to make the most beautiful coffee. Same when you're cooking. It's not the ingredients. It's not the cook. It is how the cook and the ingredients relate together, as were the beautiful, uh, meal comes from. And so I started making these beautiful cups of tea and wonderful cups of coffee. And he would give it to this prison officer with a smile. Here you are. So enjoy your coffee. And I asked him after a month, how's it going? Waste of time, you said. Well, I said carry on because he had nothing else to do. Isn't a prison, you know if you're in the real life, you know you probably give up. But being bored, nothing to do. He carried on. And the great thing was we got our breakthrough out about 2 or 3 months. I forget exactly how long it took, but roughly about 2 or 3 months. When he came to teach the meditation class and he came up to me smiling, this prison officer. So what's happened? He said, we got a breakthrough with this dog. So what happened? He said, I gave this cup of coffee and I made it really nice. I got some special biscuits for someone and I gave it to him and said, he is your beautiful cup of coffee, so enjoy it. And this prison officer, without looking round, said, uh. I got a grunt out of it. He acknowledges me. I'm there. It's the same, you know, with your husband or with your wife. Sometimes just just a glance is the breakthrough. You crack the damn wall. And as you know, when that crack comes in, you know, it's very, very small time before the whole thing starts to disappear. You've got a little relationship going there. There's a connection. You've made that connection. A grant has come back. And it was like that. About 2 or 3 weeks later, he came up to me and he had never even biggest smile. And he said, I gave this prison officer didn't call him a dog anymore. I gave him a cup of tea with a special sandwich I made and said, here you are, sir. I got this for you. I know you like this type of sandwich. And he said, this prison officer turned around, smiled at him, and said, thank you. And I may not seem much to you, but I always remember that occasion because that prison officer, that prisoner told me said, you won't believe this, Sergeant Brown, that thank you has gone all around the prisons in Western Australia on the grapevine, that that prison officer could actually smile and say thank you to a prisoner who was unprecedented. He'd never heard that before. Completely impossibility. You'd made a relationship there by focusing on the space between the tea maker and the tea the giver and the receiver. That's where the love, that's where the energy. That's where spirituality lies. So spirituality is not in a book, not in the reading of the book. What's in between you? Spirituality. This talk is not what's coming from my mouth and not what goes into your ears is what's between that. The relationships we have. That's where we work on spirituality. That's where we work on love. That's where the problems of life are solved. So in the end, it doesn't matter what you have to experience in life. It's not death, which is the problem. It's the way we relate to it. There we can find a place where we can go to a deathless realm, to a place without suffering. Everything we to experience in life is just that, something out there. And if you put the problem with the experience, you've lost the plot. If that's the case, you'll always be trying to manipulate and control the experiences of your life to situations of your life. The people you're with in life always trying to manipulate, control and change them to be just so you'll end up so frustrated, angry, even. Your lack of ability to control this world. And sometimes afterwards, people turn inside and think it's awful. So we try and control ourselves and change ourselves. That's one of the problems, actually, with Buddhism. Sometimes it's just too self-focused. That's why we have this dichotomy sometimes in Buddhism, Mahayana, which is completely concerned with other people's enlightenment. Put off your own enlightenment for the sake of others. That's wrong. Well, you have the idea which is just concerned about your own enlightenment. That's wrong too. Both of those were not work. That's not Buddhism. Neither was Buddhism. It was between you. It's not you. You don't turn in on yourself. You don't turn outwards to others. You turn to us, between you. So whatever you have to experience in life, even pain, physical pain in the body, it's not the pain's fault. It's not my fault because I've done some terrible karma in the past. That's not the problem is how you relate to that pain. So next time you're in agony. Look at the pain. Look at the experiencer and see what's between you. A lot of times there you will see this terrible negativity. It's terrible. I don't want this controlling when you're not relating to pain in a proper way. There is something you can do. Can you try and get rid of the pain? You can't get rid of the pain if you try it, you know. Be in, be tough and be strong and grit your teeth and say, I can enjoy this. I can endure this, I can endure this. You won't be able to. You're looking at the wrong place. But look what's between you. It's amazing what you can do in that place, because there you can actually say, I can put some love and compassion there, paying the door of my hearts open to you. I'm not going to block you. I'm not going to put a big barrier to try and prevent me from relating to you in an open, compassionate way. Which is why that little phrase my father said to me, son, that all my heart serves you no matter what you effort here. I relate that to all things in life. Pay. The door of my heart is open to you no matter what you do. Opening a door. The door is what's between you and what you're experiencing. The same way that the door is very often between us and our enemies. We don't want to let them in. And those enemies are not just people. I think you're getting to understand from this talk. Those enemies are situations in life events which we have to experience. Losing a job, getting a cancer. Having an operation. Having someone we love die, whatever it is. Is there a door between you and that experience? If there is, open that door so there's nothing between you and what you're experiencing, then is a sense of oneness between life and the experience, a sense of unity. This is how I practice in my meditation, is how what I learn from meditation, how I do the meditation. It's not what you experience in the mind which is a problem. It's always how you're experiencing. Which is why in Buddhism we've got something we call the five hindrances. This is a bit of technical Buddhism just to give this talk a bit of class. The five hindrances are desire, ill will, slot and torpor, restlessness and remorse and doubt. If you look at what those things are, it's nothing to do with what you're experiencing. It's nothing to do with you. It's what's between you. Like desires is what's between you and that object. You can just go past the shop. You know, you've got that sort of. Especially if you're a monk. That beautiful cake there in the afternoon when you can't eat it. Because when are you allowed to eat in the morning? It's not the cakes fault. It's not my fault. It's what I put between me and the cake. Now I want one, one, one. Oh, that's really delicious. It's amazing. As a monk, I've found that whatever it is in the afternoon always is very, very appealing. When I get it in the morning, I can eat it. It's not so delicious anymore. It's amazing just how fantasy makes these things delicious. For example, you think of your favourite food right now. Think of it. Just imagine it right now. That favorite food of yours? Just think of just putting in your mouth now to melt in your mouth and. Now, whatever you think it is now when you actually eat it, it's not like that at all. This is what desire does. It actually bends the whole and perverse, distorts the whole experience. And there's no peace. It messes things up like desires. What's between you and the experience of the thing? Same as ill will, I don't want I hate this, I don't like it. Is what you put between yourself and the experience. But how often are you tortured by anger, by ill will, or just burned by desire and by wanting? And all these things you really want to have, and you love to have them. Why do you do that to yourself? Is because we never actually look in the right place where we should be lucky. Which is why in my meditation, sometimes whatever I've experienced, it doesn't matter. I'll leave it alone. I say mind, the door of my heart is open to whatever you're experiencing. If you're tired and sleepy, that's fine. If you're angry or angry, if you've got something out there which you don't like, that's fine. You let it in pain. You can let in whatever it is. You don't put any barrier between the experiencer and the experienced. Sometimes that people talk about the result of meditation as a unity and non-duality or oneness of the mind, what we called imparting a key to the oneness of the mind. In deep meditation, where the mind all comes together in a beautiful sense of stillness and oneness. How can you get a state of oneness of the mind when you put barriers between you and what you're experiencing? When you don't accept, you don't have peace. You don't have love. And compassion to this moment when you try this out. It's incredible just how powerful it is to get your mind into a state of unity. If it's the sound of a dog barking outside, it's not the dog's fault. It's not your fault for reacting. It's the reaction itself was between you and that dog. That dog. It shouldn't be barking. It shouldn't be like that. That's what the door you put between you and the experience. So you open the door, dog. You allow to bark. Go for it. Why are you allowed to bark? Go for it. Husband, you're allowed to growl. It's just so charming the way my husband growls. Whatever he is. What is it accepted there? How can there be any problem? Of course the problems disappear. So in meditation, we learn actually to watch that space where we call the hindrances to peace and also the hindrances to understanding. That's where they lie. So those five hindrances, if you contemplate them, desire and ill will, like stop and torpor, lies, a dullness, restlessness, the doubt that's between you and the experience. So we sweep those hindrances away when it's nothing between us and what we were experiencing. Now, first of all, is a clear scene. Just like when there's no obstacle between me and that camera and then the camera can see me. But if somebody stands up. That obstacle means there's no seeing. There's no wisdom. So we take away what between us and the experience. But also when we take that barrier, that door away. This piece, this freedom, is what we always wanted in life. The sense of oneness with whatever we were experiencing. There you find the freedom. It is a freedom made of light, love. So this is actually where we should be putting more attention in our life. For example, it's no. If it's like people of a different religion, it's not the Muslim faith or the Christian faith or the Jewish faith. It's not the Palestinians. And Israel. It was between them and what they put between Palestine and Israel, a big wall. And of course that is the problem. All those walls are the problem. And what walls do we put up between our fellow human beings, between the other beings who live on this world, who share our time with us? And what walls do we put up between the experiences of our life when there's no walls put up there? All those things we thought were negative, terrible things. And what is incredible? Just how you can transform them into being beautiful, wonderful experiences, but you can make use of, learned from and love. Which is why that I was talking with a monk on her way here that sometimes I know not a monk who is sister. One of the people here earlier. I love trying to take myself out of my comfort zone. Recently, the one of the people in Singapore was telling me they wanted to invite me. Over to take part in a play. They were doing a little Buddhist play about the perils of building a casino in Singapore, and they wanted to sort of try and sort of make some sort of religious sense out of this. And what should Buddhists do? When is a casino being built? Should be objects to another object. So they want to have a play. And they wanted me to play the part of the monk, play myself in this play. I've never been an actor in a play as a Buddhist monk before, but I thought, that's cool. I'll have a go at that. Until I time I was doing a range retreat when I can't go, so it's pretty disappointing. I couldn't go in the end, but I always about putting myself in places I'd never been before seeing what happens. Because that way you're actually taking down those doors, taking down your your areas where you feel so comfortable, where you feel so secure taking those down and feel understand. You can be secure anywhere. You don't have to have things just so. You can allow life to change. And you know that whatever life does, whichever way it goes, it's not life's problem. It's not my problem when I know how to make that which is between me and my experience pure, beautiful, loving, kind. Which is why do they say the Buddha never rejected any being, any person, no matter what class or caste they came from, no matter what gender, no matter what race they came from. Because when you make that pure between you and that person, it doesn't matter who they are. It's what between you. That is how we relate. So whenever you're talking to another person, if you have tiredness and you put tiredness between you and the person talking to you, there's no communication there. If you put some sort of desire what you want out of this conversation between you and that person, there's no real listening. It is an old ill will between you and that person. How can you really be with them? You have to clear that space. So there's true communication. So try that the next time you're talking with somebody. Especially if it's someone you just had an argument with. Someone has been some trouble with sometimes has been some past karma with when you're with them. Whatever you see between you sweep it away. Old stuff. Sweep away fears for the future. Sweep away tiredness, desires, whatever it is, sweep away so that you look at that space between you and them and make it clear. Of course. Then communication happens. Peace happens. Growth happens. You find you're becoming a spiritual person, becoming a saint, a holy one. Why? They call it a holy one? Because there's nothing between you and them. Just a big hole. How do you. What? I struggled very hard to make jokes for this talk. So it's not the joke. It's not you. It's what's between you and that bad little problem. So that way, your kids and you, it's what's between you that's a problem. So try and empty that out. What's between you and yourself? Have you got a barrier up between you and yourself? If there is that barrier there, that door. Of course. You never get peace with yourself. You never can live with yourself. You can always get into depression or anger or whatever it is. So this is why we always say, take down the door between you and yourself. My little story about the door of my heart is open. That doesn't go far enough. That's only part one of my, um series of books on Buddhism. The next book of stories would not be, say, opening the door of your heart, he said, tearing it off the hinges. That's the title of my next book. Saying that the office hinges and throwing it away and burning it because there's no door left there, not even to close, let alone open. So that way there's nothing between you and what you experiencing. No craving, no attachments, no ill will, nothing. Imagine you could do that in this world. Someone calls you an idiot. There's nothing between me and that. I can accept it fully. I could even love it. Thank you so much for reminding me of my stupidity. Thank. You. You have this terrible accident. Thank you so much for reminding me how to see impermanence of all my possessions Or your will, a lottery. Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to help build the retreat center, which leaves a lot of money. So just. Oh, there it is. So this is a way that we can actually practice our spirituality. So what spirituality is spirituality doesn't belong with Buddhism. It doesn't belong with Catholicism. It doesn't belong with some Pope or some Dalai Lama or some whatever it is. You find that spirituality is what's between, say, Buddhism and Christianity. That's why that was it I mentioned last week. I should have mentioned it more. This beautiful, um, discussion meeting we had with the Benedictine monks of New Nausea and the Buddhist monks, the serpentine. And if you'd have been there, you'd have seen there was nothing between us, which was wonderful to see where people expected there to be barriers. There was none. Or even on Wednesday, the chaplain at Curtin University, Doctor Eric Venditti. I think he's supposed to be an Anglican. I think he was actually the guy who nominated me for the John Curtin Medal last year, an Anglican nominating a Buddhist, which I compared to a Fremantle docker nominating an eagle. That's very impressive. And actually, to see you talking with your friend. There's nothing between us where there should be enemies. There's nothing between you. That's where spirituality lies. So any religion which tries to stand aside and apart from others, which says we are the only truth. You have to believe in us. And everything else is evil and wrong. You can see that that cannot be spirituality, because that's creating doors and barriers and walls between others. Because spirituality doesn't lie in such dogmatism, such one sidedness. Spirituality will always be real. Religion will always be in the spaces between us. In what lies between the different religions? That's where you find the most beautiful spirituality. When they meet together that's where you find the most moving times. When people are once enemies, embrace as friends. When the Palestinian hugs the Israeli. That's what's very moving. When that moving encounter, which I remember during the Truth and Reconciliation Committee run by Archbishop Desmond Tutu in South Africa, when one of the Afrikaner security guards who or policemen who admitted torturing to death one of the members of the ANC when he recounted what he'd done in front of this man's widow and the widow came up, hugged and kissed him, said, I forgive you. When the victim came to torture her, met together. And put nothing between them. That was spirituality. That was what was moving. That was when. Love light. Love light lies. Light. So this is where we should be focusing on. And once you learn that that's where you're supposed to be focusing on your relationships, your life, your health, your possessions, material lack of them, your friends, you're going to have friends who are Christian. You can have friends were Muslim and friends who are terrorists. Who cares? It's what's between you. And then, of course, there's no terror anymore. Everything gets melted away. That's not only creating a harmonious world, but also creating a harmonious life, creating a harmonious mind. In deep meditation when it's nothing between you and what you're experiencing in that nothingness, the mind enters. Is Janice a unity of mind? This is the path to nirvana, to enlightenment, to a oneness, to a non-Jew ality focusing on what's between you and you. The experience there is where spirituality lies and doesn't come from God. Love doesn't come from wanting it. Peace doesn't come from you. It arises in what's between us. So focus on there. Put your effort there and then we may have a harmonious, peaceful, happy world. And there we go. That's your talk for this evening.
